In the name of faith, hope and especially charity, will the people of Great Britain please put their clothes back on? This instant. Right now. Without delay. What we mean is, what has got into you all?
This year, the number of individuals willing to pose stark blooming naked for 2007 charity calendars has reached plague-like proportions.
From every corner of the nation, they come a-wobbling in front of the cameras wearing nothing but a frozen smile and a naked desire to do their bit for the charity of their choice.
Good for them, yes? But it means that the rest of us are forced to confront newsagents' racks filled with the kind of sturdy Saxon torsos that were never designed to be viewed in the harsh light of day, except perhaps by pluckier members of the medical profession.
I've been decrying this trend for ages.