Really, Jen

Who cares what you want to talk about? You're a diversion to us. We read about you and Brad and Vince and Angelina when we want to get away from reality, which is all too depressing.

As the great Mark Steyn wrote in a hilarious account of the Liza Minelli wedding, the beauty of the celebrity culture lies in the fact that we get to watch your extravagent comings and goings at no cost to us. You exist for our entertainment.

[I]n the end, unlike Mad King Ludwig, they have no power over us. It is the genius of America to have disestablished not just the church but the aristocracy. Instead of the latter, we have pop peers and movie marquesses and video viscounts moving through the ersatz rituals of their class purely for the amusement of the masses. What an inspired notion.

So don't trouble us with your opinion of the President. We get enough of that from the nightly news. What we wanna know is: Are you and Vince Vaughn really an item?