Go for the piano player ... or the tympanist

A new book uncovers the secret lives of oboists. In Mozart in the Jungle, Blair Tindall dishes on sex, drugs and classical music.

"Instrument players had a sexual style unique to their instrument,” she writes. “Neurotic violinists, anonymous in their orchestra section, came fast. Trumpet players pumped away like jocks, while pianists’ sensitive fingers worked magic. French horn players, their instruments the testiest of all, could rarely get it up, but percussionists could make beautiful music out of anything."